Contentment is a hard thing for me. Partially, because I'm so used to the feeling of discontent that when I am content I almost don't know what to do with myself. But lately, I've been learning more about what contentment is and what contentment isn't. Let's start with what it isn't. Contentment isn't:
a) having life go exactly as you'd like it
b) the state of feeling happy and excited all the time
c) a feeling at all
d) eternal optimism
Contentment is:
a) a choice that I make or don't make on a daily basis
b) something that comes from pursuing the Lord more than pursuing my own needs
I guess I tend to get caught up in this ridiculous cycle: if I were in another country, traveling the world, I would be content or if I was going to college in another place I would be content. Or if I just weren't still here! If I had a job, if I quit my job, if I had a better job, if I could spend my time painting or writing, if I was in a relationship, if I just didn't have to deal with boys period, if I was busier, if I wasn't so busy...do you see where this is going? No matter where I am, there will always be something about my life that isn't perfect or even satisfactory. I can spend my time whining about these things, or look beyond them and choose to have a good attitude.
Paul said that he had learned the secret of being content in any and every situation. And I think the difference between Paul and me is that I focus on the temporal and Paul focused on the eternal. His focus was heavenward, whereas I keep looking at my circumstance. Hmm...maybe it's time that I took a little hint from this apostle. Because honestly, I really don't want to spend my entire life whining about what's wrong with it. That sounds like fun. I'd rather focus on the things that are good. And the one thing that never changes: the Lord. No matter where I am, He will always be the same. He will always be good. Keeping my eyes on Him will radically change my perspective and remind me that this world is only for awhile. The best is yet to come.
So, here's to looking beyond my circumstances. And choosing contentment.
Monday, August 23, 2010
Thursday, August 19, 2010
The Intercessor's Heart
The call of an intercessor is not exactly glamorous. Seriously, there is no self-glory whatsoever involved. I mean, being a missionary to the long lost tribes of Indonesia isn't exactly glamorous either, but it definitely has its glory appeal. Whhat Christian doesn't like a story of the heroic missionary who goes in against all odds and leads and entire people group to Jesus? But, intercession? Nada.
You see, as an intercessor, you spend all this time, energy, and emotion praying for people or nations who have absolutely no idea--and never will have an idea--that you did. You may even come to care deeply for people who may never even know you exist. That's the crazy thing about intercession. Sometimes you spend all this time in prayer for people you don't even know and who definitely don't know you. What's even crazier is when the Holy Spirit reveals things to you about these people that you couldn't possibly know or give you a picture of His heart for them and a glimpse of their calling. And your job is to pray. And you may never ever see the effects of your prayers. Yet, still, you pray.
Awhile ago, God asked me if I was willing ot take up the mantle of intercessor. "It's hard." He said, "There's no glory and no glamour involved. It will hurt. Your heart will break and those for whom it breaks will never know. You will learn things about people that no one else knows and you'll cry for those you've never met. If you accept, you will know my heart for people and come to love them as I love them. You may never see how your prayers effected them. But they will. Are you willing?"
For a long time, I was silent, pondering. I pondered the prospect of pain. I don't like pain. I pondered how no one would see. I like being noticed. I pondered how I would get nothing in return. I want compensation. As I pondered, I thought about how foolish it was for God to ask me to do something like that. "Really? He thought I'd say, "yes"?" The words I heard running through my brain were not exactly laced with surrender, "Why, sure, God! That sounds like my idea of a good time! Heart breaking for people I don't know. Swell."
I kept pondering. And then my ponderings led me down another path. I pondered the people who no one ever prayed for. The people no one saw or cared about. In my heart, I heard the words of Ezekiel the prophet.
"I looked for a man among them who would build up the wall and stand before me in the gap on behalf of the land so I would not have to destroy it, but I found none." Ezekiel 22:30
And suddenly, I knew. I couldn't say, "no." These people may never know that I prayed, but that didn't matter. What matters is that I prayed. All of a sudden, I felt this earnestress rise up inside of me, this passion for those whom no one else would pray for.
"Yes." I said, scarcely believing the words coming out of my mouth, "I'll take it. I'll take the mantle of intercessor."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes. I'm sure."
You see, as an intercessor, you spend all this time, energy, and emotion praying for people or nations who have absolutely no idea--and never will have an idea--that you did. You may even come to care deeply for people who may never even know you exist. That's the crazy thing about intercession. Sometimes you spend all this time in prayer for people you don't even know and who definitely don't know you. What's even crazier is when the Holy Spirit reveals things to you about these people that you couldn't possibly know or give you a picture of His heart for them and a glimpse of their calling. And your job is to pray. And you may never ever see the effects of your prayers. Yet, still, you pray.
Awhile ago, God asked me if I was willing ot take up the mantle of intercessor. "It's hard." He said, "There's no glory and no glamour involved. It will hurt. Your heart will break and those for whom it breaks will never know. You will learn things about people that no one else knows and you'll cry for those you've never met. If you accept, you will know my heart for people and come to love them as I love them. You may never see how your prayers effected them. But they will. Are you willing?"
For a long time, I was silent, pondering. I pondered the prospect of pain. I don't like pain. I pondered how no one would see. I like being noticed. I pondered how I would get nothing in return. I want compensation. As I pondered, I thought about how foolish it was for God to ask me to do something like that. "Really? He thought I'd say, "yes"?" The words I heard running through my brain were not exactly laced with surrender, "Why, sure, God! That sounds like my idea of a good time! Heart breaking for people I don't know. Swell."
I kept pondering. And then my ponderings led me down another path. I pondered the people who no one ever prayed for. The people no one saw or cared about. In my heart, I heard the words of Ezekiel the prophet.
"I looked for a man among them who would build up the wall and stand before me in the gap on behalf of the land so I would not have to destroy it, but I found none." Ezekiel 22:30
And suddenly, I knew. I couldn't say, "no." These people may never know that I prayed, but that didn't matter. What matters is that I prayed. All of a sudden, I felt this earnestress rise up inside of me, this passion for those whom no one else would pray for.
"Yes." I said, scarcely believing the words coming out of my mouth, "I'll take it. I'll take the mantle of intercessor."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes. I'm sure."
Sunday, August 15, 2010
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