That Awkward Moment When...

Normally I'm not a big fan of "that awkward moment" phrases as they are cliche and overused. But I couldn't really think of a more fitting title for a blog entirely about awkward moments. Of which there have been many. As most of you are very far far away, I have decided that it is only fair that you get a small taste of some of my hilariously painful and (warning: other overused cliche teenage phrase coming up) "FAIL" moments. Here goes....that awkward moment when:

-You find yourself staring in bewilderment at your front door. You have frustratingly been pulling at the key to your house, which refuses to budge. Finally you get your landlord to come help you and wait upstairs while he fixes the problem. Over an hour later he reappears with a new key for you as yours broke off in the door handle and he had to replace the whole lock. Oops. 

-On a hot, sultry afternoon you are on a walk. You are not particularly fond of the place you chose to walk that day as it is out of your ordinary sphere. A man in a car rolls by and (I am assuming) offers a ride. He doesn't listen when you say, "Nuk flas Shqip" (I don't speak Albanian) multiple times and keep walking. So finally you yell at him in tongues until he drives away. Let's avoid this road from now on. Yikes.

-You're going to exchange money and find yourself, not at a bank, but next to a foreign man in a back alley, late at night. Every scene from James Bond, Mission Impossible, and basically every action film floods your mind as you tensely glance both ways, then pull out your hefty load of cash (okay...if you call 800 dollars hefty) before making the discreet exchange. Except that instead of a back alley on a dark night, it was the side of a busy road, in the middle of the day, and the only one who considered this event even remotely James Bond-esque is you and your overactive imagination. Fail. 

-It's 11:00 pm. You've been out later than you planned and you just want to get in nice and quiet to avoid waking your landlords who live on the bottom floor. Only problem is the gate to your door is locked. You have to ring the doorbell for your roommate to let you in (thus waking the landlords). And when she opens the door, the alarm goes off. Quiet...or not.

-You woke up early, had a glorious run through the city. You are feeling victorious (and a little rebellious) that you went on a run before most of the world was up to gawk at you and remind you that you're "not in Kansas anymore, Toto."  You have just taken a luxurious bath and are dreaming of the awesome breakfast and coffee you are about to serve yourself. However, upon getting out of the tub, you bump a pipe coming out of the wall. In an instant your peaceful morning is interrupted by a torrent of water spewing from the wall. For what feels like forever you stare in shock, contemplating if running down three flights of stairs in a bathrobe is an acceptable way to ask for help. You decide that it isn't, get dressed with soaking wet hair, all while your bathroom floods. Screaming hysterically, "Ramiz! Ramiz! Uje! Uje!", you attempt to let your landlord understand the urgency of the situation. He doesn't. So you scream some more, "Hajde! Hajde!" and run upstairs, motioning for him to follow. He saunters slowly after you. When he FINALLY gets upstairs, he meanders into the pool otherwise known as "the bathroom" and turns a knob less than two feet away from the tub, thus stopping the water. Yep. 

-Two lovely Albanian girls are staying at your house for the weekend. However, a few weeks ago a screw came out of your bathroom door handle and you haven't bothered to put another one in (mostly because you don't know how to ask for it Albanian and you've learned the trick of carefully opening the door so the handle doesn't come off). Well, you forget to mention this little detail to your guests and the handle comes off. And, this time, we can't figure out how to get it back on. It's late at night and we don't want to wake up Ramiz to come fix it, so we decide we'll all go to the Center (which is right next to my house) to use the restroom there. Well, let's just say our attempts at silence utterly failed. Ramiz came to see what all the ruckus was and why on earth we were at the Center so late. sheepishly, we (or i should say Irena as she speaks Albanian!) explained. On the plus, he opened up the second story apartment for us to use until he fixed the door. That's good, right? 

Well...there are a few of my awkward moments. Hope you got a few laughs and experienced a glimmer of the trauma I've been through. I'm sure I'll have to go through counseling or something for all this. If nothing else, I've learned to find humor and hilarity in my day to day mishaps and experiences. Near or far, I hope you'll do the same! In the mean time, I'll try not to break anything...