I found this tonight...and re-read it. Oh, how timely is this! My circumstances are a little different, but my heart is in the same place...striving, worry, fear. And the Lord's response is still the same. Written over a year and half ago, it's as applicable as if I wrote it yesterday. So let's revisit some truth...
February 28, 2011
Go Figure
I sometimes refer to myself as "one who is professional at freaking at things that I shouldn't freak out about." Tonight, this staunch career was in full force as I mentally wrestled with an overloaded mind (making sleep incredibly elusive.) An overbooked schedule, work, school, Bible studies, worship meetings, future school, travel, how to make money for travel, plans, thoughts, ideas...and a sore throat all plagued my throbbing noggin. As I lay in a tub of steaming water (I had to calm myself down somehow!), I felt the Holy Spirit whisper, "Is all this really your responsibility?"
"Yes, God." was my snippy response, "If I don't take care of all this, who will?"
Once more, "Katelyn, is all this really your responsibility?"
When He asks questions again, that generally means my answer was wrong the first time. However, never one to be easily dissuaded: "I'm not sure You understand, I have to do all this stuff. I have to have it figured out. I have to have a plan!"
"Oh? And all this is your responsibility, is it? And just where do I fit in?"
"Well...umm..." I stuttered mindlessly for a moment. He waited while I fumbled for words, before speaking, ever so tenderly.
"Don't you trust that I can take care of you? And I don't actually need your help."
I wanted to argue on about my responsibility and how I needed to take care of things, but I was starting to see that it was pointless. After all, this is the Creator of the Universe. I guess it makes sense when He tells me that He doesn't actually need my help. Go figure.
In my mind, I saw a picture of huge storehouses of wealth--filled with way more money and resources than I could even imagine. And I heard the Holy Spirit whisper, "Just ask. All of these resources are at your fingertips. All you have to do is ask."
February 28, 2011
Go Figure
I sometimes refer to myself as "one who is professional at freaking at things that I shouldn't freak out about." Tonight, this staunch career was in full force as I mentally wrestled with an overloaded mind (making sleep incredibly elusive.) An overbooked schedule, work, school, Bible studies, worship meetings, future school, travel, how to make money for travel, plans, thoughts, ideas...and a sore throat all plagued my throbbing noggin. As I lay in a tub of steaming water (I had to calm myself down somehow!), I felt the Holy Spirit whisper, "Is all this really your responsibility?"
"Yes, God." was my snippy response, "If I don't take care of all this, who will?"
Once more, "Katelyn, is all this really your responsibility?"
When He asks questions again, that generally means my answer was wrong the first time. However, never one to be easily dissuaded: "I'm not sure You understand, I have to do all this stuff. I have to have it figured out. I have to have a plan!"
"Oh? And all this is your responsibility, is it? And just where do I fit in?"
"Well...umm..." I stuttered mindlessly for a moment. He waited while I fumbled for words, before speaking, ever so tenderly.
"Don't you trust that I can take care of you? And I don't actually need your help."
I wanted to argue on about my responsibility and how I needed to take care of things, but I was starting to see that it was pointless. After all, this is the Creator of the Universe. I guess it makes sense when He tells me that He doesn't actually need my help. Go figure.
In my mind, I saw a picture of huge storehouses of wealth--filled with way more money and resources than I could even imagine. And I heard the Holy Spirit whisper, "Just ask. All of these resources are at your fingertips. All you have to do is ask."
I've been freaking out about how on earth I'm going to pay my bills and get to Europe and pay for school and all of the traveling I want to do unless I work 70 hours a week for the next six months (in addition to school and ministry), all the while forgetting that my Dad has all the resources in the world. Literally. And when I'm walking with Him, He'll make a way, He'll open doors, and He'll provide all that I need. Oh, and He doesn't actually need my help.
Go figure.
Hebrews 4:16
"Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need."
Luke 11:8-10
"Ask and it shall be given to you, seek and you shall find, knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks the door is opened."
Philippians 4:19
And My God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus."
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